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lyrics

Locked in my self doubt
I will never escape
As the waters of my depression
Start rising to my waist
It feels like merely living has been
my selfless accomplishment
And I’m so sick and tired
Of trial and error

The conditions are bleek
All morale is challenged
In this town where I know my fate
Is in sync with all my past regrets
But the first world
Comes at a price
And too many times I forget
Who I am and how to stand

Life isn’t life when happiness
comes on a piece of paper
when beauty fades
when want is need
and when God is you and me

But in my head
I am truly dead

I, I need, I needed this, I needed everything to go my way
Because I’ve forgotten the difference between right and privilege

I use to always romanticize
The idea of my own suicide
Just wishing that I could live
with my heart in my hands
Thinking no one cares
Is truly unfair
And I sit here
Harboring my make believe
While this cruel world
Takes another life
From a boy who would kill for mine

credits

from I Had a Million Thoughts in My Head, released June 29, 2012

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